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Volume V · Issue 5 March 16, 2009

Wisdom Connoisseur™ Ezine

This free monthly online publication is your voice of clarity on weight loss™

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We often hear about the $60 billion or so a year that’s being poured into the North American weight loss industry — most of it to no avail — but what about the precious energy of people’s lives that’s currently being consumed by weight issues? Money aside, this energy — in the form of worry, control, fear, preoccupation (the list is endless) — amounts to quality of life costs that are enormous.

It’s my mission to target this energy of every life I touch, free it up and unleash it back out into the world in more productive ways. That’s why my approach has been and always will be first and foremost about personal growth. This is the only way to properly address weight issues. More specifically, I take people through a progressive personal growth, evolution and leadership process, designed to have an outcome of permanent weight loss.

My central premise begins with acknowledging that self-love is the basis for anything you want to manifest in your life. It continues with recognizing we’re all addicted to struggle yet we all want to feel the power of joy. It then introduces three fundamental truths of personal growth and ten core philosophies of weight loss. Mark my words, anytime your efforts falter, you’ll find you’re rejecting one or more of these.

Describing the process further, I teach three developmental stages: Awareness, Truth and Alignment. These are conscious and intentional ways of being, designed to transform your experiences. Each stage has a set of four meta-skills for practicing and embodying higher ways of being. Meta-skills are not basic life skills you apply as needed. They’re essential life skills that permeate every thought and action. It’s these skills that create the person you need to become to allow your weight loss. Each stage also has a full set of innovative concepts to support it, for a total of 40 major pieces.

You won’t find a more comprehensive weight loss coaching process available in North America. More importantly, you won’t find one that treats people with such dignity. I’m not sure when the “bootcamp mentality” became the norm but degrading yourself in the name of weight loss is not OK. Perhaps it’s the lure of the quick fix. No threat of that with this process — it’s designed to take you at least a year to complete it.

My feature article for this issue is the first in a series that maps out how change happens. It’s interesting to observe just how often people announce a significant change in their life and then expect everything to fall into place around it. I’m delving under the surface to demystify why change can be so elusive. The explanation might even give you a chuckle. Ethel Barrymore said “You grow up the day you have your first real laugh — at yourself.” So enjoy!

With reverence,

kb signature

Coach Kath

New Offering: Does this process sound both scary and exciting to you? That’s a clear indicator it may be exactly what you need at this time in your life. I’ve streamlined my Know Thyself foundation session to 3 hours. Even if this is all you choose to explore at this point, it can be a powerful step forward. And remember, it’s fully guaranteed. Check this page for all the details.

How Change Happens: Part 1 The Ego Factor

When you’ve tried to create significant change in your life, such as weight loss, did you ever think about what you were actually invoking? Or did you just say “I’m going to change. Today’s the day.” and then expect it to happen? My guess is it was the latter. Until you realize what’s going on under the surface, change will remain elusive to you. This article is the first in a series that maps out how change happens.

Who will I be if I let go of who I think I am?

Who we THINK we are is a collection of perceived roles, possessions and circumstances. At a deeper level, you sense there’s much more to you than this but heading down that path of personal discovery is a scary prospect — I mean after all, who will you be without all of this? That’s a huge unknown and it’s the biggest barrier to change.

Your perceived self is Ego. Your deeper self is Soul. And if you think about it, Ego has been running the show for a long time. Ego has to subside for Soul to emerge, but anything that threatens Ego’s control triggers anxiety, and we’re all wired to avoid anxiety. Hmm, bit of a catch-22.

If we take a closer look at what really constitutes anxiety, there’s pain and then there’s discomfort, each generating different degrees of anxiety. The times we feel true pain in our lives are rare thankfully, but discomfort is a common occurrence. How can you tell the difference? When you’re in pain, the last thing you can fathom is food. When you’re experiencing discomfort, however, you may have insatiable urges to eat.

Discomfort is one of the hallmarks of change. It’s the very thing that stimulates innovation — the kind of fresh, creative thought that, when applied, moves you out of the status quo. Ego is all about protecting the status quo. It interprets all discomfort as pain and triggers huge anxiety and drama to make you turn back. Why? Because on the other side of discomfort, some aspect of Soul is waiting for you to discover it and that equates to certain death for some aspect of Ego.

Developing your “muscle” for discomfort then, is key to moving forward and creating change. You may be surprised just how weak this muscle is at first, especially if you’ve spent a lifetime succumbing to your drug of choice. But just as with physical muscles, your discomfort muscle strengthens with use.

The drama doesn’t end there though. Have you ever felt you’re right on the verge of change but can’t seem to break through? Your struggle may be largely internal but if you were to pull out that part of you and witness it, it would be like watching a two-year-old rolling around on the floor having a full-on temper tantrum, with all the flourish and energy that entails.

It gets even better. Now imagine that two-year-old at the height of its tantrum, having a complete emotional meltdown, culminating in a slumped, lacklustre posture and a face-framing pout. You have just witnessed Ego’s resistance to breakthroughs. If you haven’t experienced this before, it can be quite unsettling. But it indicates the path you’re on is finally taking you towards real change.

Which means you’ll also reach an unbearable choice point on whether to quit or continue. If you quit, Ego wins. Not only that, it’s fortified. It may take you a long time to collect enough strength again to return to this point. If you continue, Soul shines through. What’s always fascinating about choosing to continue is, when you look back over your shoulder, you’ll wonder what all the fuss was about.

You’ll go through this drama many times in the course of creating change. You’ll find the tantrums and meltdowns become more like hiccups — annoying but not debilitating. Learning how to let Ego die a little each day helps Soul come to light. Give yourself permission to grieve Ego — I mean after all, it got you this far. You’ll find deep grieving brings you peace. And that question of who you’ll be? Irrepressible and irresistible!

Exquisite Chocolate

Action Item

Summary

Until you realize what’s going on under the surface, change will remain elusive to you.
Your perceived self is Ego. Your deeper self is Soul. And if you think about it, Ego has been running the show for a long time.
Discomfort is one of the hallmarks of change.
Ego interprets all discomfort as pain and triggers huge anxiety and drama to make you turn back.
Ego’s resistance to breakthroughs can be quite unsettling. But it indicates the path you’re on is finally taking you towards real change.
What’s always fascinating about choosing to continue is, when you look back over your shoulder, you’ll wonder what all the fuss was about.
Learning how to let Ego die a little each day helps Soul come to light.
Give yourself permission to grieve Ego. You’ll find deep grieving brings you peace.

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